Ryback | The Johnson Transcript

Feb 17 2013

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: Elimation Chamber (2013)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers and Bad Booking

Brodus Clay and Tensai (with Cameron and Naomi) vs. Team Rhodes Scholars

Daniel Johnson: Team Rhodes Scholars should get the win here after Tensai does something to goof up. It is a shame that Cody Rhodes and Damien Sandow are stuck in this bout. Both should be in the main event scene within a year, but if they start getting booked regularly on the pre-show then their potentially may be wasted for a long time to come.

Kyle Childers: Pass.

Bad Booking: Despite the goofy lingerie and hip hop, the newly-formed tag team of monsters could very well be a threat. As much as I’m rooting for Rhodes and Sandow, I would love to see what WWE has in store for two giant monsters who are easily convincing crushing machines. I say Brodus/Tensai for the win just because of WWE’s tendency to push monsters.

The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro (c) for the WWE United States Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Johnson: Antonio Cesaro should retain in what will be a pointless rematch. Hopefully, from here Cesaro will feud with more worthwhile opponents. Since he has moved down the card anyway and Team Hell No can’t last forever I would love Daniel Bryan to feud with the Swiss technician.

Kyle Childers: Cesaro’s been on a major roll since winning the United States title in 2012 beating such big name contenders as, um, R-Truth, Tyson Kidd and the Funkasaurus but this is his first chance to shine on pay-per-view against a former WWE champion and lucky for Antonio, his opponent is The Miz. Don’t get me wrong, that’s not a knock on The Miz by any means, unlike most other writers in this field I think he’s a solid, entertaining worker but now isn’t his time. Cesaro keeps his momentum going with a win over the Cleveland Screamer.

Bad Booking: Waste of time, as both men can easily be put into bigger and better things. I’ll take Cesaro for the win.

Tamina Snuka vs. Kaitlyn (c) for the WWE Divas Championship

Daniel Johnson: Here is bathroom break number one. Still, at least Kaitlyn is an improvement over the previous face of the women’s division, Kelly Kelly. I find it hard to believe that WWE would do anything to slow down Kaitlyn’s momentum since they seem so high on her. Tamina should go down unless she is given a brief run with the title and loses it back to Kaitlyn.

Kyle Childers: Finally the Diva’s title is getting a little bit of television time and some real angles to work with, if they’re committed to the idea of rebuilding the diva division then the smart idea would be to keep the title on Kaitlyn.

Bad Booking: The yo-yo push of Tamina part 624. She is pushed strong for three weeks, then the momentum is halted suddenly. Kaitlyn will win, and Snuka won’t have the chance to squash her adversary from the top of a Chamber pod.

The Shield vs. John Cena, Ryback and Sheamus

Daniel Johnson: I can’t see this match topping the one that The Shield had in December. I’d love to be proven wrong though. Just like The Shied proved me wrong by so far not becoming a more serious version of The Spirit Squad. With that said I think The Shield will score a massive upset.

Kyle Childers: The chances of the Shield winning this match are lower than the tops of Hornswoggle’s socks but that’s okay. With Cena likely facing The Rock at Wrestlemania, the Ryback win streak continuing and Sheamus being Irish John Cena it makes perfect sense for the odds to overcome the Shield especially with the booking possibility of rehabbing their loss at Wrestlemania. The only real prediction to make here is how foolish the Three CenAmigos make Heyman’s hitmen look in the process.

Bad Booking: It is 100 percent imperative that The Shield wins. Three promising up and comers need the rub and subsequent push more than the three guys whose solid foundation can afford a loss or two. I can see The Shield continuing their thing with Ryback all the way to Wrestlemania in an even more epic tag match. However, it needs to be said: This son of a bitch needs the Chamber, WARGAMES STYLE! It would put over The Shield as a bad-ass team who can make a super-strong babyface say I quit.

Jack Swagger vs. Chris Jericho vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Kane vs. Mark Henry vs. Randy Orton in an Elimination Chamber match

Daniel Johnson: This is perhaps the toughest match on the card to predict. I would love Daniel Bryan to win, but I just don’t see that happening. Since Alberto Del Rio will most likely beat The Big Show a heel needs to win. I’ll pick Mark Henry. Unless Jericho wins and Dolph Ziggler cashes in on Del Rio. Yeah, on second though that makes way more sense than a Henry win.

Kyle Childers: With so many possible victors it’s hard to pick just one…okay maybe not, I don’t think many would argue in favor of Team Hell No in this one and his recent time in the midcard makes it a smart bet that Randy Orton won’t be going to Wrestlemania for a title shot but with the Hall of Pain open for business again, the seemingly obvious potential match-up of Swagger vs. Del Rio, or even the incredible outlier of Ziggler winning the title and continuing the 2012 mini-feud he had with Jericho on the grandest stage of them all. If Del Rio retains then Jack Swagger will win, if my bold prediction of Ziggler as champion comes true then Y2J will be victorious.

Bad Booking: It depends where it falls on the card. Although I think the dissension between Kane and Daniel Bryan will continue.

The Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio (c) (with Ricardo Rodriguez) for the World Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Johnson: Alberto Del Rio cannot lose this one. However, The Big Show won’t be the only one disappointed. This was by far the least interesting match at last month’s pay-per-view and it will drag down the card yet again. Let’s just hope Del Rio/Show ends here and doesn’t drag on like Del Rio/Sheamus from last year.

Kyle Childers: This is a match that I’m way more excited about than I feel I have any right to be. So far, Berto and the Big Show have had great chemistry in their matches with Del Rio playing a more engaging face than he ever even approached as a heel. The obvious pick is Alberto Del Rio but maybe not for obvious reasons; one direction we could see from here has plucky babyface Del Rio against survivalist Swagger (comes with beard and kung-fu ankle lock. Zeb Colter sold separately), but with the looming possibility of Dolph Ziggler cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase and this being the last big event before Wrestlemania, it’s entirely possible that Dolph Ziggler will leave New Orleans with the title.

Bad Booking: I’m not telling who is going to win as much as that where this match is placed will be 100 percent crucial for the rest of the card. If this is placed early, that means Ziggler is cashing in and Jericho wins the Elimination Chamber. If it is placed later in the card, then expect ADR to win and have a heel like Mark Henry win the Chamber.

CM Punk (with Paul Heyman) vs. The Rock (c) for the WWE Championship

Daniel Johnson: The stipulation that if The Rock gets disqualified or counted out he loses the title makes things a bit interesting. I can’t see The Rock losing going into Wrestlemania. I think that The Rock will win after doing something that he should have been disqualified for. This will make room for Cena/Rock II to be turned into a three way with Punk.

Kyle Childers: I almost don’t want to write about this match but journalistic integrity prevents me from abstaining. Last month, I went out on a limb and picked CM Punk to retain over The Rock and technically, I was right but to be entirely honest, I wish I had been wrong. It’s hard to question that, even with the extra stipulations added, this is just WWE’s way of making The Rock look even stronger than a milk ad before the twice in a lifetime rematch with Cena in New York. Even with Punk’s historic title reign, the business potential of a second Cena/Rock showdown is too alluring to stray away from so, unfortunately, I expect the Rock to leave Elimination Chamber still the WWE champion.

Bad Booking: The Rock will retain the championship. No way he is heading into Wrestlemania without the belt, plus the publicity he could give the title would be huge as many movies are opening up soon. Did I mention the pay-per-view is sponsored by the new GI Joe movie that got pushed back from prime-time summertime so Rock can benefit from the PR? Anyhow, I think a swerve could happen in something NO ONE could expect: Brock Lesnar screws CM Punk, and establishes Paul Heyman as a guy whose primary mission is to only serve himself. Wise words from Hall of Famer (cheap pop) MICK FOLEY! Brock/Punk would be a great curve ball to Wrestlemania. Let HHH and Undertaker sit on the sidelines, because they have bigger things to accomplish.

Photo Credits:

Photos 1-7: en.wikipedia.org

Tagged Alberto Del Rio, Antonio Cesaro, Bad Booking, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Cameron, Chris Jericho, Cleveland, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dean Ambrose, Dolph Ziggler, Elimination Chamber, GI Joe, HHH, Hornswoggle, Jack Swagger, John Cena, Kaitlyn, Kane, Kelly Kelly, Kyle Childers, Lord Tensai, Mark Henry, Money in the Bank briefcase, Naomi, New Orleans, New York, Paul Heyman, R-Truth, Randy Orton, Ricardo Rodriguez, Roman Reigns, Ryback, Seth Rollins, Sheamus, Tamina Snuka, Team Hell No, Team Rhodes Scholars, Tensai, The Big Show, The Miz, The Rock, The Shield, The Spirit Squad, The Undertaker, Tyson Kidd, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Divas Championship, WWE Elimination Chamber, WWE Elimination Chamber (2013), WWE United States Championship, WWE Wrestlemania, WWE Wrestlemania XXIX, Zeb Colter

Jan 27 2013

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Smooth Runs

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: Royal Rumble (2013)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers, Jeremy Cundiff and Bad Booking

The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro (c) for the WWE United States Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Johnson: It is a crime that Antonio Cesaro is not featured on the main Royal Rumble show apart from the Rumble match itself. What would be more of a crime would be if The Miz defeated him for the WWE United States Championship. I just don’t see The Miz coming out with the victory in this one. WWE has done too good of a job pushing Cesaro to botch his title run with a loss on a pay-per-view pre-show. It is also worth mentioning that The Miz really doesn’t need a run with that championship now and if he did get it, it would probably fade into the background again.

Kyle Childers: The WWE is doing something rare with this Cesaro run, they’re actually giving him time to get over while holding the title. While he had issues early on, Cesaro has finally found a foothold with the crowd in his United States of Antonio gimmick. For this reason I see them keeping the momentum going and the title on Cesaro.

Jeremy Cundiff: I would love to see Cesaro win and set up a Miz/Cesaro program, more because I am a fan of Cesaro and want to see him over than because I’d like to see Miz catch on again. But I’m tossing up my prediction and leaning with Cesaro, even though my gut is telling me they might go ahead and put it on Miz. Either way, this one will be a solid one, or at least it should be.

Bad Booking: Cesaro gets the win and moves on to bigger and better things. Miz needs that figure four to go away!

Team Rhodes Scholars vs. Team Hell No (c) for the WWE Tag Team Championship

Daniel Johnson: I’m going to be optimistic about this one and say Team Rhodes Scholars defeats Team Hell No. Bryan needs to get away from Kane and start shining as a singles competitor. Yet, all in all it is worth mentioning that none of these wrestlers needs to be in a tag team and could all do better as singles competitors (apart from Kane who would probably just play psycho for the umpteenth time). WWE is letting their tag team division slip again anyway so Bryan, Rhodes and Sandow need to be let loose.

Kyle Childers: While I’m a fan of both teams, the graduation segment sort of brought some finality to Team Hell No. It was like a band doing their farewell concert and performing all the hits before that last encore. As much as I’d like to see Sandow and Rhodes find singles success, it’s hard to argue against them winning the titles at the Rumble.

Jeremy Cundiff: Hmm…this one’s up in the air, too. I say the champs retain, and then we wait for some more tag teams to step up…otherwise we could be heading into another tag team drought. Shame, because that shit was just starting to pick up.

Bad Booking: If there is any time to pull the trigger on the inevitable break-up of Hell No, better start here. Replay the whole Harts/Quebecers scenario, but Kane is Bret Hart to Bryan’s Owen Hart. Don’t worry about Bryan though, he’ll still be popular/over as hell.

The Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) (c) in a last man standing match for the World Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Johnson: Talk about a dull match to balance out Rock/Punk with. Alberto Del Rio will most likely win this bout that will surely serve as a bathroom break for many. I really hope they prove me wrong, but I don’t see that happening.

Kyle Childers: Didn’t we see this match already? I swear that we did, I mean, I watch a lot of wrestling but I know I didn’t imagine it. Same match, same result. WWE seems very high on Del Rio as a face but there’s always the wild card of Ziggler and his Money in the Bank.

Jeremy Cundiff: Oh God, no…I’m covering my eyes as I type this out, but Del Rio. They’re really going to try and make him a likeable face…for the love of Eddie Gilbert, just get Ricardo off on his own and out in the ring already!

Bad Booking: The most redundant match on the whole card. I wouldn’t be so surprised to see both men knocked out which allows Ziggler to cash the briefcase.

The Rock vs. CM Punk (with Paul Heyman) for the WWE Championship

Daniel Johnson: The Rock will reclaim the title and it may even close out the show. Punk has had a great run despite some hiccups here and there. There is no shame in Punk dropping it now and if the WWE wants to go with another WWE Championship run for the The Rock they probably won’t get a better time to do it than this year’s Wrestlemania season.

Kyle Childers: This one seems like a foregone conclusion to most, it’s Wrestlemania season and all signs point to the once in a lifetime rematch of Cena vs. The Rock at Wrestlemania with the WWE Championship on the line but I’m an optimist. I’m also Team Knees 2 Faces in the encounter, however foolish that may be.

Jeremy Cundiff: This is the moneymaking match for Wrestlemania. Or so I thought. I hate to say it, but I think I know where this one is going to go. The Rock beats Punk, going on to face John Cena in a rematch at Wrestlemania where Cena gets the belt back from Rock. And I don’t like it one damn bit.

Bad Booking: The Rock is going to win sadly. WWE has invested too much money in him, and not winning the title is not in the cards. Don’t worry for Punk though. He can still enter the Rumble, and enter Wrestlemania as the one who is about to end the streak!

2013 Royal Rumble Match

Daniel Johnson: I’m banking on Dolph Ziggler to pull out the victory here. Speaking of banking since Ziggler already has a Money in the Bank briefcase itcould be either great or garbage if he wins the Rumble. With the brand split over the unification of the WWE Championship and the World Heavyweight Championship should be inevitable. If Ziggler wins he could win both titles and restore them. Yet, it could be garbage as that might just be getting fans’ hopes up for something special. Plus,with all the people WWE pushes as main event players a title unification would really throw the main event scene out of whack. Apart from that as I’ve mentioned elsewhere I’d love to see El Generico appear in the Rumble even if it is just a one time appearance and that character never appears in WWE again. With there being no chance of that happening WWE better deliver as far as surprise entrants go. Also, if Rock and Punk don’t close out the show the chances of one of them winning the Rumble is through the roof.

Kyle Childers: As sad as it is, over the last few years the Rumble winner has started to matter less and less. 2008 saw John Cena use his shot at No Way Out instead of Wrestlemania, lose and then lose his rematch in a triple threat at Wrestlemania XXIV. Randy Orton, Edge, and Alberto Del Rio all won the Rumble and then lost their title challenges while the sole Rumble winner/champion got his shot in an opening match that lasted 18 seconds. This year seems to be the year that WWE brings some significance back to the Royal Rumble and that burden looks like it will fall on John Cena.

Jeremy Cundiff: I see Cena and Ziggler are both in this match, and I see two potential outcomes. One is John Cena winning, and going on to face The Rock in a Wrestlemania rematch for the WWE Championship. That is the predictable one that I’ve seen coming since last year, and one they’ve probably had booked for a while. The other is the one that the fans are seemingly demanding, the one that goes against all logic. That one is Dolph Ziggler winning the Rumble, thus being the only guy to ever have two guaranteed title shots at the same time…and that’s all I’ve got to say about that. As for miscellaneous stuff…screw Wrestlemania, THIS is the one pay-per-view a year I will spend the cake on. And the Royal Rumble match is the reason why. It is the big shock event of the year, seemingly, where you can see guys returning for just one night, or coming back to blaze a new career path. You can see strange pairings, amazing match-ups, and moments where shit just stops making sense. I LOVE the Rumble, and where WWE has spent 2012 to be firing on all cylinders, I can only hope they’ve saved something for 2013. Tonight should be worth the delinquent cable bill, my friends.

Bad Booking: Dolph Ziggler or John Cena are the really obvious answers to me. Ziggler for the heel heat, and Cena to set up Wrestlemania with The Rock. That being said, don’t be surprised if Brock Lesnar and HHH brawl to start their Wrestlemania program. Also, I think Mark Henry returning to destroy The Shield would be an awesome sight too. Ryback most likely will have the most eliminations, because he needs to be fed!

Photo Credits:

Photos 1, 3-5: en.wikipedia.org

Photo 2: dropkickradio.com

Tagged Alberto Del Rio, Antonio Cesaro, Bad Booking, Bret Hart, Brock Lesnar, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, Eddie Gilbert, Edge, El Generico, Heath Slater, HHH, Jeremy Cundiff, John Cena, Kane, Knees 2 Faces, Kyle Childers, Last Man Standing Match, Madman Szalinski, Mark Henry, Money in the Bank briefcase, Owen Hart, Paul Heyman, Randy Orton, Rhodes Scholars, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ryback, Team Hell No, Team Knees 2 Faces, Team Rhodes Scholars, The Big Show, The Miz, The Quebecers, The Rock, The Shield, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Now Way Out 2008, WWE Royal Rumble, WWE Royal Rumble 2008, WWE Royal Rumble 2013, WWE Tag Team Championship, WWE United States Championship, WWE Wrestlemania, WWE Wrestlemania XXIV

Dec 27 2012

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Smooth Runs

How The Shield Changed The Game

by Bad Booking

Ryback looked to be on his way to become WWE Champion.

At the Survivor Series, this meat hook of a superstar was decimating perennial favorites CM Punk and John Cena. This big hoss looked like he had it all in control.

Until three strange men showed up.

They took to the colossus and beat him down like a bitch. This allowed CM Punk to retain the title and for the WWE Universe to wonder, “What could have been…”

WWE had been shaken to its core thanks to three rebels who had a mission.

Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns formed an alliance to take down their perceived notion of evil. With their SWAT-like attires, and with the color scheme to match, they looked like Dark Knights in a federation where backstabbers and hypocrites line the streets like stained pieces of laundry. Their video promos were also reminders of The Joker’s speeches from The Dark Knight, with grainy video and crystal clear messages of mayhem.

While coming into the ring via the audience isn’t new, their approach in why they do this is. If there is one man, or two men waiting to be preyed upon, it is best to attack from different angles to get their kill in uniform fashion.

This style of warfare was put to an extreme test at the last WWE pay-per-view event T(ables)L(adders)C(hairs).

To think, their match was created completely by accident.

CM Punk had been having problems with his knee for some time. Two weeks before TLC on Raw, Ryback blew his case wide open with an attack that encompassed all three elements of TLC. Originally, Ryback had a title match with Punk in a not-so tender-loving-care environment.

Now with Punk out due to surgery on said knee, the big guy is thrust into a new predicament. He now has a six-man TLC match with partners Daniel Bryan and Kane to take on this dastardly triumvirate.

This new team is what should have been called Team Hell n’ Back (copyright Freakin’ Awesome Network forums).

The match that would ensue could very well have been the most significant match of 2012. Of the decade. Hell, of this millennium!

For 25 minutes, these six men all tore each other a new asshole. Some bumps were bigger than others, but how it was combated felt completely original.

The Shield would separate one man, not unlike an animal from a pack, and completely wear him down. This happened to all three men on Ryback’s team, and in some cases more than once. While the babyfaces would all have turns making comebacks, they could not string together lasting momentum. The Shield was always there to break the submission or to break the pinfall.

In the end, it took Seth Rollins sacrificing himself off of a 20 foot ladder through four tables to allow Reigns/Ambrose to pick up the duke. The three wounded soldiers of fortune valiantly fought the elements.

This match, created by accident because of unfortunate circumstances, made three new stars in one night. It was the 2012 equivalent of the 1999 No Mercy ladder contest between Edge/Christian and The Hardy Boyz.

WWE had problems finding new talent to curate and grow over the last decade or so. Thanks to creative changes, and with men like the ones in The Shield on the full time roster, the future looks a little more secure.

Tagged Christian, CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, Dean Ambrose, Edge, Freakin' Awesome Network, Jeff Hardy, John Cena, Kane, ladder match, Matt Hardy, Roman Reigns, Ryback, Seth Rollins, Team Hell n' Back, The Dark Knight, The Hardy Boyz, The Joker, The Shield, TLC, tlc match, WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Monday Night Raw, WWE Survivor Series, WWE Survivor Series 2012, WWE TLC: Tables Ladders & Chairs, WWE TLC: Tables Ladders & Chairs (2012), WWE Universe, WWF No Mercy, WWF No Mercy 1999

Dec 14 2012

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Smooth Runs

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: TLC—Tables, Ladders & Chairs (2012)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers, Jeremy Cundiff and Bad Booking

Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio vs. Team Rhodes Scholars in a tables match

Daniel Johnson: It would be nice if WWE got behind Sin Cara, but even if his team did win I still don’t see that happening. Sin Cara will probably take the loss in this match and Cody’s mustache will get one of the biggest pops of the night. Team Rhodes Scholars might even win clean. This will set up another Team Hell No/Team Rhodes Scholars match. Ideally, this time around Team Rhodes Scholars will walk away with the titles and Bryan can get showcased more as a singles competitor.

Kyle Childers: This match is one of the bigger toss-ups of the evening, both teams could easily win and challenge Team Hell No (since THN reside on the “Kane” end of the “Face-Tweener-Heel-Kane” scale of alignment) but it makes slightly more sense to see Rhodes Scholars pick up the win here because they have a ton of momentum in the growing tag division. I’ll admit to bias though as I love to see Team Hell No and Rhodes Scholars’ segments and anyone that finds fault in that has no soul. Regardless of who wins, this match has the potential to be one of the best of the night, especially with the added tables gimmick.

Jeremy Cundiff: The WWE booking has been working here lately because it’s been returning to a classic formula: faces win the big showdown, end of story. I see no reason for this to be any different (unless that long-rumored Rey/Cara match at Wrestlemania is really going to go down, in which case this is the perfect time to break out the setup for that). I would love to see Rhodes and Sandow get a cheap win, just to keep their momentum going. Maybe this match will exceed expectations and actually elevate some people, instead of just being some more Botchamania footage brought to you by the tables, Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio’s knee surgeon.

Bad Booking: I hope Cody and Damien get the win, while the first chink in the 619/Cara armor starts to show. Seriously, this is a really good time for the tag division. The last few years have had a dearth of great moments, but the current crop of teams can make something memorable happen. Expect some crazy bumps for sure!

Wade Barrett vs. Kofi Kingston (c) for the WWE Intercontinental Championship

Daniel Johnson: Kofi Kingston is beyond stale at this point and desperately needs his gimmick tweaked. In case you haven’t noticed it isn’t just us smarks that think this anymore. Even the crowds in cities with a lot of casual fans seem to be reacting less to him. I’d like to see Barrett completely brutalize Kofi and start a feud with some face that comes out to save him. The most likely candidate would be R-Truth. From there WWE could retool Kofi’s gimmick and breathe some life into it. Depending on where WWE is in their yo-yo pushing of Barrett at least part of that just might happen. I’ll stay positive for this prediction and say Barrett wins…but I doubt anything will be fixed for Kofi.

Kyle Childers: This match both has potential to be the undercard match of the night and biggest disappointment. I’m not saying that it’s not going to be at the very least good match, but I can’t help but have the selfish wish that they had made this a TLC match. With the WWE Title stipulation out of the main event, it makes sense to put the TLC stipulation to good use here but I digress. There hasn’t been a whole lot by way of story to base this prediction on so purely by preference I pick Wade Barrett, WWE’s favorite male prostitute.

Jeremy Cundiff: Pass.

Bad Booking: I think Kofi will barely pull this one out. Expect the match to be mainly based around Wade keeping the ever-flying Kofi grounded. I wouldn’t be too surprised if a fluke roll-up was used to win it. At the same time, there will almost assuredly be the rematch on Raw the next night, and expect Wade to win the title then.

R-Truth vs. Antonio Cesaro (c) for the WWE United States Heavyweight Championship

Daniel Johnson: I don’t care what his detractors say. I love Antonio Cesaro to death. The guy manages to bring it every time he is on pay-per-view even though WWE never gives him more than eight minutes. Seriously, look it up! R-Truth is also a capable hand in the ring especially when he has a good person to work with such as Antonio Cesaro. This will be another contest under eight minutes, but those eight minutes will entertain anyone who gives it a chance. I’m hoping Cesaro has a much longer run with the WWE United States Championship, possibly one that breaks the record for longest champion with that title in it’s current incarnation. From there Cesaro could be moved up to the main event and capture the World Heavyweight Championship. Of course being a European heel he would think that the rest of the world is worthless so he changes the title to be the WWE European Championship. To kill two flies with one Cesaro he could then win back the WWE United States Championship and throw it away as a worthless belt. That way the company would be back to having just the right amount of belts and eventually the WWE Intercontinental Championship would work its way to being more prestigious than the WWE European Championship and all would be right in the world. Anyway, I’m getting way ahead of myself here.

Kyle Childers: Let me take a second to rip the Band-Aid off for a certain segment of those reading this, the R-Truth push is over. It died a long time ago when he started dancing with Little Jimmy. Remember when R-Truth was awesome and crazy? Those were great times but they were also at least one kid friendly t-shirt ago. Now, for the rest of the people reading this I ask, how does Cesaro vary his uppercut before scoring the victory?

Jeremy Cundiff: Pass.

Bad Booking: Expect Antonio to retain in a hotly contested, but predictable match. R-Truth can probably use that Little Jimmy gimmick to some extent, but in the end, it’ll be Claudio with his Swiss demeanor getting the best out of the former K-Kwik.

Sheamus vs. The Big Show (c) for the World Heavyweight Championship in a chairs match

Daniel Johnson: I’m not a fan of how Sheamus has been booked for…well the past year or so really. I’m not going to say he should turn heel, but this jokey face Sheamus reminds me of face Batista when he started to get really lame. If WWE wants to add any realism to his character he should lose this match and then go on a journey to find the true Sheamus and bring back the monster that crushed Daniel Bryan in 18 seconds. Yes, I know the Sheamus who won at Wrestlemania was still the same lame jokey Sheamus, but factors like that never stopped WWE revisionism before. As you may have guessed I am a bit pessimistic here and expect fun loving Sheamus to stick around because WWE loves to hock that merchandise and few sell it better than a smiling face. Still, I just don’t see him winning. Show needs to have a longer reign so that he can elevate whoever gets the World Heavyweight Championship off of him. Hopefully, it is someone who hasn’t had a belt that significant before.

Kyle Childers: Does anyone win in this match? Yes, that’s a snarky question but it’s all I can muster. I’m not really excited by this feud that peaked when Big Show broke that podium during the verbal debate and has been on a fast decline since the first couple of times Sheamus was on the receiving end of a solid face-punching. Throw in the bizarre chairs stipulation and you have a match on par with a Jim Belushi one man show in terms of entertainment value. I’ll pick Sheamus out of hopes that Ziggler retains and the WWE is more likely to book a heel cash in on a face.

Jeremy Cundiff: One is a veteran enjoying what is likely to be his last run at the top. The other is the one of the few homegrown WWE talents that has not been overexposed. Unless they don’t have someone to go up against Sheamus at Wrestlemania in mind yet, I’m going with Sheamus. He’s going to be around for a while, and he’s still got a lot of upside left to explore. Big Show is a placeholder, but at least he’s a decent one who you can believe stands a chance against The Plaid Iced Gingerbread Man. This match is one I see going either way, but the nod in the long run goes to Sheamus.

Bad Booking: This is going to be brutal. Both men are known for slug outs and this is no exception. This could provide happy nostalgia for Sheamus as three years ago on this event he won the WWE Championship from John Cena. For Big Show, this could also be deja vu as last year he won and lost the World Heavyweight Championship in an ironic chairs contest. I think Sheamus is going to pull this one out on a desperation brogue kick to Big Show. Only there will be a chair involved in that as well.

John Cena vs. Dolph Ziggler for a World Heavyweight Championship contract in a ladder match

Daniel Johnson: I’d love for WWE to do something crazy with this match. Like have Ziggler sneak attack Big Show early in the night and win the World Heavyweight Championship requiring two of the top matches to get a last minute change. Still, even that could backfire and lead to Ziggler getting his second incredibly short run with the World Heavyweight Championship after he is still forced to wrestle Cena. However, I don’t see WWE doing anything that whacky. I expect Ziggler to win the ladder match through underhanded tactics. Perhaps, someone will interfere so Cena could start his next feud?

Kyle Childers: This match is what wrestling is all about, emotion. I know sometimes my opinions come across as a bit obsessed with logic, booking and ring work, but I value entertainment and emotional investment as much as those other things. With that out of the way, I’ll say that my emotions regarding this match are based solely on the fear that my personal favorite performer in the WWE currently may lose his World Heavyweight Championship shot. With Ziggler getting wins over Randy Orton (yet still eating brogue kicks, can I take back my Sheamus prediction?) and his history as a performer the company seems willing to push it seems possible that he could win but with Cena’s history of being John Cena we could very well see Ziggler lose his Money in the Bank briefcase. I’ll go with my bias and pick Dolph Ziggler but the bigger question here isn’t who wins but what role does AJ Lee play?

Jeremy Cundiff: On YouTube, I saw a clip from a Terry Funk roast where Scott Hall, sitting in the back with beer in hand, said the following: “You told me this a long time ago, Terry, and I’ll never forget it…you told me ‘don’t get too good at doin’ jobs, kid. That’s all you’ll ever do.’ ” Touche. I see this as nothing more than a vehicle for Cena to miraculously appear back in the World Heavyweight Championship picture just seconds before The Rock makes his three-month vacation stop in the WWE. Yeah, I’m a little salty about this one. But truth be told, this is the way it’s got to go. Ziggler is too good at losing to ever be taken seriously as a winner. That’s going to pay off for him one day, but only as a face. Hopefully this match won’t ruin that.

Bad Booking: Dolph has to win. No ifs, ands, or buts. Ziggler may have been a world titlist before, but this is his time to be the man in the WWE. If WWE was smart, they’d make The Shield run in and take out Cena. They could also allege Vickie Guerrero was in on The Shield the whole time. It would make a lot of things make sense, but it would also potentially compromise the heat these guys have. The only thing I can guarantee is that win or lose, Ziggler will look like a million bucks. Even if it kills him. Then there are some fantasy booking options. For instance, take the World Heavyweight Championship match, and place it third in the lineup. Sheamus wins and is also very groggy. Dolph runs in, cashes in the briefcase. Dolph wins the title and he thinks he’s all good for the night. Now Vince McMahon shows up and forces Dolph to defend that title in the originally scheduled Ladder Match with Cena. Now take that ladder contest, leave in The Shield interference, and we got ourselves a bumpy ride for the future. Cena/Orton/Ryback/Bryan/Kane vs. Seth Rollins/ Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/Ziggler/CM Punk as a potential main event? I’d bite! And with how Orton is supposed to turn heel, that would be the right time to pull the trigger.

Team Hell No and Ryback vs. The Shield in a TLC match

Daniel Johnson: I really wanted to go with The Shield on this one even if it would have meant that I predicted a card of straight heel wins. It at least would keep the wind in their sails which they desperately need because if you strip them of everything else they are basically three guys who have never been on national TV long term and that casual fans could give or take. Still, I just don’t see them winning especially with WWE’s recent tendency to have newcomers lose even when they desperately need to win. For evidence of this look no further than Ryback in the very same match. Yes, I see Ryback giving his shell shocked finisher to one or two members of The Shield through a table for the victory. The Shield will then go on to be a more serious version of The Spirit Squad before being disbanded. Hopefully, they are sent packing in a more dignified manner than being put in a crate and shipped to developmental.

Kyle Childers: The likely main event of the evening really deserves the spot but once again I have to question what the point of the TLC stipulation is here. Are they going to climb a ladder to retrieve Paul Heyman because if so, take all of my money six months ago you magnificent bastards, if not and this match is a pinfall TLC then it’s got to be an indication that management doesn’t have faith in Ryback to work for extended periods even with five better performers working around him without a gimmick involved. Nonsensical stipulation aside, any match with this combination of guys is sure to be entertaining and I don’t see why this won’t be either. Storyline-wise, a Shield victory would help establish them as a legitimate threat after weeks of ambush attacks and a Team RyNo win would certainly lend a bit more credibility to the tag titles just because the champions won and would keep the Ryback momentum. Conventional wisdom would see The Shield win and continue wrecking things for weeks to come so that means Team RyNo will win.

Jeremy Cundiff: Oh boy. The best thing to do would be to give The Shield the win at this point. These guys have got to be pushed strong, as they have been. That means getting it done in the ring too, not just outside of it. It’s obvious that the Ryback = title contender thing isn’t working out, and nobody is going to stop cheering for Kane and Bryan if they lose this match. I predict The Shield because WWE cannot be that stupid, and if they are going to put the heels over in just one match it better be these guys. Remember that Nexus came in and sent shockwaves all over, but within six months half the group was either injured, released or back in developmental. It’s how you handle the ball once it’s started rolling.

Bad Booking: Team Hell No/Ryback vs. The Shield in a cluster fuck: I’m sorry guys for my language, but that is exactly what it is. Six men full of war. Tables. Ladders. Chairs. One fall to a finish? If I got my notes correctly, this is the first time the WWE has done a one-fall ladder contest (I have seen ECW matches with this though). I fully expect Ryback to destroy The Shield, and Kane/Bryan to get weakened up for the title defense the next night on Raw.

Photo Credits:

Photos 1, 3-6: en.wikipedia.org

Photo 2: onlineworldofwrestling.com

Tagged AJ Lee, Antonio Cesaro, Bad Booking, Batista, Botchamania, chairs match, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Dean Ambrose, Dolph Ziggler, ECW, Jeremy Cundiff, Jim Belushi, John Cena, K-Kwik, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Kyle Childers, ladder match, Little Jimmy, Madman Szalinski, Money in the Bank briefcase, Nexus, Paul Heyman, R-Truth, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Rey Mysterio Jr, Roman Reigns, Ryback, Scott Hall, Seth Rollins, Sheamus, Sin Cara, tables match, Team Hell No, Team Rhodes Scholars, Team RyNo, Terry Funk, The Big Show, The Plaid Iced Gingerbread Man, The Rock, The Shield, The Spirit Squad, tlc match, Vickie Guerrero, Vince McMahon, Wade Barrett, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE European Championship, WWE Intercontinental Championship, WWE Monday Night Raw, WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable, WWE Tag Team Championship, WWE TLC: Tables Ladders & Chairs, WWE TLC: Tables Ladders & Chairs (2012), WWE United States Championship, WWE Wrestlemania, WWE Wrestlemania XXVIII, YouTube

Dec 02 2012

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Wrestling Lists

6 Great Matches You’ve Never Seen: Part II

by Jeremy Cundiff

2. Taka Michinoku vs. The Great Sasuke from WWF In Your House 16: Canadian Stampede (1997)

Thank you for your bandwidth. Last week, you asked me for a great match you had never seen and I gave you Sid vs. Vader. For those of you who didn’t run screaming, this week I’ll be rewarding you for your loyalty. And if you’re just tuning in, this is the second of six installments where I dig up classic matches that nobody remembers seeing. Today, we go from 1996 in the WWF to 1997, and it’s going to look like a whole new world. For those of you who don’t remember…the first image is the WWF in 1996.

WWF entryway and ring from 1996

Then came 1997…

WWF entryway and ring from 1997

This was only a nine month period, by the way. Within another nine month period, we would have practically a new company, as everything from the Raw theme to the WWF logo itself would change drastically. I got to say that to a young kid like me who spent his entire childhood watching the old red, white and blue roped product, only to hit junior high and see the WWF grow up with you, turning from a family-friendly cartoon into a cutting-edge rock music video…I really don’t care how badly I am butchering English grammar. The WWF was fucking unrecognizible from one side of the transition to the other, and I got to have a front row seat for the greatest time to be a wrestling fan. It really was another Golden Era.

But not everything was a resounding success back then. For every Steve Austin, The Rock, Mankind and D-Generation X…you have Brawl For Alls, Billy Gunn King Of The Rings and you have WWF Light Heavyweight Championships. Not all of it worked. One day I’ll rip the Brawl For All out of its own rectum in a separate article, and I know someone else will already have the ‘biggest disappointments of all time’ covered somewhere down the road. But out of all of those things I just mentioned, the WWF Light Heavyweight Championship should have not only worked…it should have flourished. It was the hardest of the three to fuck up.

In the summer of 1997, the WWF and WCW were on a hot streak that was so hot, we’re still finding pieces of molten metal to this day from the trail that the business left during that period. Every time we see Ryback squash somebody, a piece of history flies off into the crowd. One of WCW’s biggest draws was one of its smallest…its cruiserweight division. Rey Mysterio Jr. and Eddie Guerrero are the two who acheived the most success outside of WCW, but it’s not like they had a bunch of scrubs to work with: Chris Jericho, Ultimo Dragon, Psychosis, Juventud Guerrera, Alex Wright, any Mexican luchador you can think of who wasn’t signed long-term to AAA or CMLL, and many more. And while two 240-pound men can put on a mat wrestling clinic, and pack it with tons of drama and action…let’s face it. There are things a smaller wrestler can do that the big boys just got to give up and go home on. And these men would follow up such high-flying offense with a power move to equal. Chris Jericho would powerbomb your ass, pick you up off the ground, powerbomb you again, then bounce off the ropes and hit you with a springboard moonsault. You know…I think Kurt Angle is one of the best of all-time, but I don’t see him pulling off a springboard anything. (Well, given his track record wth the 450, I predict that if Kurt Angle tries to springboard anything, he will just headbutt his opponent so hard they shit themselves.)

Naturally, when your competitor is doing something different and making money at it…you have to do the obvious and copy the bastard, or come as close as you can to copying him without breaking the law. So Vince McMahon did the smart thing, and introduced the WWF Light Heavyweight Championship. Vince then did the dumb thing and booked the worst fucking tournament ever to crown the inaugural champ. This tournament was the worst of all time. At least until Survivor Series 1998. Want proof? Let me give you the first round brackets. Aguila, known better as Essa Rios, defeats Super Crazy in a botchtastic clusterfuck of a match I remember watching live on Monday Night Raw while Jim Cornette, on commentary, blasted the fuck out of it because both guys were sloppy as piss. While some people like to call him an old fogey set in his ways, you couldn’t argue with him watching this match. It was pretty bad. The rest of this thing? Eric Shelley over Scott Taylor, Brian Christopher and Flash Flanagan. Jerry Lynn was advertised to be in one of the opening matches, but something tells me the weed wore off right before the pen in his hand touched the paper because he never did show up for that first round match. Way to add prestige to your brand new title by having one of the best talents in the division ditch your tournament before the first round.

Oh, and Devon Storm lost to the eventual winner, Taka Michinoku. Taka Michinoku…now there is a man with some talents and abilities. A man that, honestly, you could watch walk into a new company in a foreign country, win a belt, and not question it because let’s face it, the guy can wrestle. But nobody in the WWF knew that. Only one of those guys had ever stepped foot in a WWF ring before this tournament in Scott Taylor, and he was perennial enhancement talent up to this point.

Well, I take that back. Two of them. Because in July, Taka Michinoku made his WWF Debut against…THE GREAT FUCKING SASUKE. That’s right. Pick the brick up that just fell from under your chair. Taka Michinoku wrestled Great Sasuke on a WWF pay-per-view. In 1997. But wrestled isn’t the word for it, more like kit-foo’d.

Kit-foo means “kicked the fuck out of.”

And that was this match. Kicks, kicks, flying kicks, flying moves, grappling, holy shit slap, kick, slap…and then they stopped playing around, and began to really tear into one another. At one point I wondered if maybe one of them owed the other money, or if Taka ate the last piece of sushi at lunch, possibly Sasuke screwed his sister and this was a precursor to the Val Venis pee pee angle…I don’t know, I just want to know why these two got in the ring, worked for two minutes, then mutually agreed that they would begin to stiff and shoot until either they died or the FBI sent riot troops to protect the crowd from the shockwaves when these guys hit each other. I thought I saw the ring ropes themselves cower in fear at some of the kicks Sasuke was landing.

Look this match up. I won’t post .gifs or stillshots of this match (other than the one above) because they won’t do it justice. No matter how high the quality or the framerate, I cannot articulate this match to you with neither words nor pictures. Stiff, stiff, stiff. No restholds necessary for these two, despite going fifteen minutes. Plenty of dives to the floor. Taka does a springboard plancha to the outside and gets so much airtime on his jump, I thought he was going to check a faulty lightbulb while he was up there. He had to have died a minimum of three times in this match, and still kicked out on rigor mortis alone. After it’s all over, Taka eventually does the job to Sasuke…who poses briefly, and then it’s back to the locker room and back to reality for the WWF fans.

Daniel pointed out to me that yes, these two did have a second match on Raw the next night after this match. Strangely enough, Taka lost yet again making me wonder who was supposed to win that belt in the first place. If it was Taka, making him lose his first two matches really hurt the credibility of the title in my opinion, particularly in such good matches. Taka needed to have a match of this caliber where he WON. They just needed to pay Sasuke whatever they needed to pay him to job this match. If they had, perhaps the WWF Light Heavyweight Championship would have been so much more prestigious that instead of the afterthought that the title had become (in less than two years, Gillberg would be your damn LHC) it might have gotten the dignity it deserved. This match should have been the showpiece for the WWF’s Light Heavyweight Division. If you had told the 12 year old me watching this match that there was an entire division with titles just for guys this small who did this stuff, I’d swear to never watch a heavyweight match again until the next week on Raw.

So…why don’t people remember this match? Because it was Calgary Stampede, a throwaway show with only one match: the ten-man tag featuring The Hart Foundation versus the makeshuft tandem of The Legion of Doom, Goldust, Ken Shamrock, and Steve Austin. The only reason this shit even sold tickets and pay-per-view buys was the fact that it took place in Calgary and the place went apeshit for the Harts. They also went apeshit for this match as well. I think this match was a treat for the smart fans of Canada, and possibly the smart fans in America as well. If this pay-per-view had taken place in, say, Pittsburgh or Kansas City…I highly doubt we would have gotten such a good match. This pay-per-view was meant to put the Harts over and make everybody a ton of money for going black and pink for a day. A lot of stuff got overlooked, including the WWF Championship itself.

A smart man would have paid The Great Sasuke whatever he asked for to do the job to Taka. I don’t know if the plan was for Taka to become the first LHC all along, but if it was, they did a shitty job of making us think he was a credible champion right out of the gate with this match. He made us believe he was a tremendous wrestler and he would never give up, that he had a fighting spirit and was somebody we all should rally behind. But those are qualities of a championship CONTENDER. Those aren’t qualities of somebody you want to put the belt on initially. If this was the route they wanted to go, they needed to put the belt on the only other person they seemed to give a shit about pushing in the Light Heavyweight division…Brian Christopher. Problem was, he was a half-ass worker from Memphis who, quite honestly, couldn’t hang with the Japanese or Mexican workers or even the American high flyers. If you don’t remember, he was Jerry Lawler’s son, and they all but told you this on TV because fuck it, had to get him over somehow.

So this thing was kind of doomed from the start, as they had to make everyone look like a credible contender all at once, and there’s only one belt you can give to a guy. Nobody knew who these guys were, and all they knew is they were good, but when we saw them the first time they got beat. Some more effort into pushing who you had, or at least going out and paying the money for a little bit more, could have went a long way. Oh well, at least we got to see a kick ass cruiserweight puro match in the WWF. And that’s awesome with me.

Next week…I’m not sure what you’re going to get, but whatever it is, rest assured it’ll be awesome. It’s a surprise. Hey, maybe you could leave comments and suggestions to me as well. I like to incorporate other people’s opinions into my work, it’s how you become a better critic. I’m also curious to see what people think of my work so far. So please drop me a line. We have a comment button for a reason. I’m Madman Szalinski, and in the words of Jim Cornette…”if you wanna know what a guy looks like with bald hair, tell me first so I can book him in a hair match and sell some tickets, k? Thank you, fuck you, bye.”

See the match for yourself by forking over $94.99 to Amazon for a VHS tape because YouTube hates us.

Photo Credits:

Photos 1-3: youtube.com

Tagged "Stone Cold" Steve Austin, AAA, Aguila, Alex Wright, Billy Gunn, Brawl For All, Brian Christopher, Calgary, Chris Jericho, CMLL, D-Generation X, Devon Storm, Eddie Guerrero, Eric Shelley, Essa Rios, Flash Flanigan, Gillberg, Goldust, Japan, Jeremy Cundiff, Jerry Lawler, Jerry Lynn, Jim Cornette, Juventud Guerrera, Kansas City, Ken Shamrock, Kurt Angle, Legion of Doom, Madman Szalinski, Mankind, Memphis, Mexico, Pittsburgh, Psychosis, Rey Mysterio, Rey Mysterio Jr, Ryback, Scott Taylor, Sid, Steve Austin, Super Crazy, Sycho Sid, TAKA Michinoku, The Great Sasuke, The Hart Foundation, The Rock, Ultimo Dragon, Vader, Val Venis, Vince McMahon, WCW, WWE Monday Night Raw, WWF, WWF Championship, WWF In Your House 16: Canadian Stampede, WWF King of the Ring, WWF Light Heavyweight Championship, WWF Survivor Series 1998

Nov 26 2012

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Wrestling Reviews

WWE Survivor Series (2012) Review

by Daniel Johnson

This year’s Survivor Series had a decent main event and two above average traditional Survivor Series matches. The opener placed a bright spotlight on WWE’s growing tag team division. Sure, it didn’t come close to the awesomeness that the tag team Survivor Series’ matches in 1987 and 1988 had behind them, but it was great for what it was. The other elimination match had its moments and gave a nice little rub to Dolph Ziggler. The Big Show/Sheamus bout was an improvement over their last pay-per-view encounter though the lame disqualification ending took away from it. The night ended with an intriguing twist that left fans asking, “what happens next?” Yet, for now let us take a look back at what was.

Brodus Clay, Justin Gabriel, Tyson Kidd, Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio (with Cameron and Naomi) defeated Tensai, Primo, Epico, Darren Young and Titus O’Neil (with Rosa Mendes) in a traditional Survivor Series match

There are no quick eliminations in this contest as the bout has a decent amount of back and forth before anyone has to leave up the entrance ramp. The highlight of this early portion of the match has to be the double Asai moonsault that Sin Cara and Mysterio deliver to the outside. The fun has to stop at some point and the first one out is fun loving Brodus Clay after a running senton splash from Tensai. The big man looks dominant, but Gabriel quickly upsets him by sending him to the back with a crucifix pin. Titus O’Neil, everyone’s favorite muscular walrus, soon enters but he is likewise upset by Gabriel’s tag team partner as Kidd flips inside the ring to roll O’Neil up. Gabriel and Kidd are on fire and Epico is sure as heck isn’t going to stop them. He submits after Kidd locks on the sharpshooter and Michael Cole even makes a reference to the 1997 Survivor Series Montreal Screwjob during this. Only Primo and Darren Young are left on the heel team, but in a flash it is down to just Darren Young after Rey comes in and pins Primo with la magistral. Young is all alone and before he gets eliminated he takes a 619 followed by a Sin Cara swanton followed by a top rope lionsault from Gabriel, an elbow drop off the ropes from Kidd and a top rope splash from Rey. Stick a fork in him already!

Rating: 4 stars

Eve (c) defeated Kaitlyn to retain the WWE Divas Championship

Before the match someone in a blonde wig attacks Kaitlyn backstage. This time Kaitlyn catches her and reveals the attacker as…Aksana! Eve approaches Kaitlyn backstage and tries to appear sympathetic only to be pushed on her arse by Kaitlyn. The match is above average especially considering the current WWE diva division. One section of the bout that stands out is Eve wrapping her legs around Kaitlyn’s neck in a submission and actually flipping her over with it. This work on the neck is later revisited in the finish when Eve puts Kaitlyn away with a neckbreaker.

Rating: 3.25 stars

Antonio Cesaro (c) defeated R-Truth to retain the WWE United States Championship

Cesaro cuts a killer heel promo on his way to the ring and references America’s poor economy and soaring obesity rates. It is a shame WWE hasn’t given this guy enough time to work on pay-per-view lately. R-Truth gets a near fall after some clotheslines, but hurts his leg following a kick. Cesaro sees this weakness and goes after it. In less than seven minutes Cesaro pins R-Truth after hitting the neutralizer.

Rating: 3 stars

Sheamus defeated The Big Show (c), but did not win the World Heavyweight Championship

Prior to this match there is an overly long segment featuring AJ Lee and Vickie Guerrero. AJ shows some photoshopped images of Vickie Guerrero in compromising positions with Ricardo Rodriguez, Jim Ross and Brodus Clay. Guerrero then screams at her before AJ points out that neither one of them can attack the other without facing consequences. Tamina Snuka then comes out of nowhere to attack AJ much to the delight of Vickie. Anyway, this championship match showed off the raw power of Sheamus. He hit Show with an electric chair that was followed almost immediately after with white noise. Imagine what Sheamus must lift in the gym? Sheamus is just about to take Show’s head off with a brogue kick when the mammoth pulls a ref in front of him. In the commotion Sheamus gets distracted and Show wallops him with a WMD. Show pins him, but soon after the ref changes the decision and Show is disqualified. Sheamus comes back to his senses for a short time before becoming livid and making Show beg for mercy after a vicious assault involving a chair.

Rating: 3.25 stars

Dolph Ziggler, Damien Sandow, David Otunga, Wade Barrett and Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) defeated The Miz, Kofi Kingston, Kane, Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton (with Mick Foley) in a traditional Survivor Series match

Unlike the previous elimination match this one is a tad faster with it’s first eliminations. The commentators play up the injury of Damien Sandow’s partner Cody Rhodes and before long Sandow joins Rhodes in no longer being a part of this match. Kane doesn’t send Sandow to Hell, but comes close to it after executing a mighty chokeslam. The dissension among the teams gets highlighted next when Kane is eliminated in short order by Ziggler after Kane gets distracted by arguing with partner Daniel Bryan. Ziggler stays alive in this one, but the same cannot be said for Otunga who soon finds himself tapping to a crossface from Bryan. Bryan tags out and soon Kofi is in. Nearly as quickly Kofi is out after Barrett knocks him down to the mat with a bull hammer. Bryan goes one for one with the next elimination. First he made Otunga tap, but now he finds himself submitting to Del Rio’s cross armbreaker. It is between The Miz and Barrett for who will be sent to the back next. After a decent back and forth fight, Miz reverses Barrett’s wasteland to score the skull crushing finale and the pin. Miz stays in, but not for long as he is sent packing after a dropkick to the back of the head from Del Rio. Orton is all alone, but still manages to take out his foe Del Rio with an RKO. Orton almost wins the whole thing, but gets a surprise when he is about to punt Ziggler. Ziggler turned out to to be playing possum and instead of taking a kick to the face, Ziggler gives one to get the win. Oddly enough there wasn’t much involvement from Foley though he did go after Rodriguez at one point.

Rating: 3.75 stars

CM Punk (c) (with Paul Heyman) defeated John Cena and Ryback to retain the WWE Championship

Earlier in the nigh Heyman gave an interview to hype up Punk and the longevity of his reign. If he retains the title tonight he will officially have a yearlong title reign. Punk looks to be in good shape and it helps him out that the faces are not afraid to tangle with one another. Punk is even the first one to hit his finisher by surprising Cena with a go to sleep. Of course, Cena kicks out and delivers an attitude adjustment to Punk…who also kicks out! It is fitting that Ryback is a former Nexus member because up next the Nexus run-in gets revisited. Seth Rollins, Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns come into the ring and start manhandling Ryback right after Ryback had planted Cena with his shell shocked finisher. Instead of emerging victorious Ryback gets planted right through an announce table. Meanwhile Cena is still out and Punk takes advantage of the opportunity to retain his title.

Rating: 3.5 stars

Photo Credit: en.wikipedia.org

Tagged AJ Lee, Aksana, Alberto Del Rio, Antonio Cesaro, Brodus Clay, Cameron, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Darren Young, David Otunga, Dean Ambrose, Dolph Ziggler, Epico, Eve, Jim Ross, John Cena, Justin Grabriel, Kaitlyn, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Montreal Screwjob, muscular walrus, Naomi, Nexus, NXT, Paul Heyman, Primo, R-Truth, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Ricardo Rodriguez, Roman Reigns, Rosa Mendes, Ryback, Seth Rollins, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Tamina Snuka, Team Hell No, Team Rhodes Scholars, Tensai, The Big Show, The Miz, The Prime Time Players, Titus O'Neil, traditional Survivor Series match, Tyson Kidd, Vickie Guerrero, Wade Barrett, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE Championship, WWE Divas Championship, WWE Survivor Series, WWE Survivor Series 2012, WWE United States Championship, WWF Survivor Series 1987, WWF Survivor Series 1988, WWF Survivor Series 1997

Nov 18 2012

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Wrestling Clips

WWE Survivor Series is Tonight

Whoever wins tonight’s main event between CM Punk, John Cena and Ryback for the WWE Championship will most likely face The Rock at the Royal Rumble next year. So I figured along with the hype video for the 2012 edition of the Survivor Series I’d post a match looking at where The Great One came from.

That’s right! This match features Rocky Johnson. Also, if you’re perverted enough you can freeze frame it and zoom in to see exactly where The Rock came from (spoiler: testicles). There is so much about this clip that I adore. First, you have the randomly upbeat and surprisingly mainstream music playing as some savage action from Puerto Rico plays in the intro video. Next, you have the match itself. I love how WWC shamelessly presents this match as if its supposed to be an even match up. By the look of Rocky’s physique he was juggling bowling balls prior to the fight. By the look of the jobber, El Rebelde’s physique he was eating marshmallows the size of bowling balls. Still, it is The Rock’s dad after all and like father, like son Rocky is willing to sell for anyone. Try not to laugh when El Rebelde has Rocky literally against the ropes while he takes turns kicking and choking him. Will he hold out? Can he hold out? Well you’ll have to watch to find out.

Tagged CM Punk, El Rebelde, John Cena, Puerto Rico, Rocky Johnson, Ryback, The Great One, The Rock, WWC, WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Royal Rumble, WWE Royal Rumble 2013, WWE Survivor Series, WWE Survivor Series 2012

Oct 29 2012

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Wrestling Reviews

WWE Hell in a Cell (2012) Review

WWE painted themselves into a corner in a variety of ways with WWE Hell in a Cell 2012. The outcome to the CM Punk/Ryback match for the WWE Championship was bound to be disappointing no matter how it unfolded. At least a run-in could have added an unexpected twist to it. It wouldn’t even necessarily have to be Brock Lesnar (though he probably would have been the best choice). Instead what fans got was a lame nut shot from the referee. Going beyond the main event though WWE had to have known that Sheamus/Big Show was going to be a slow mess that couldn’t possibly make up for Punk/Ryback. While Sheamus/Show was not the worst bout on the card it by no means was a great battle. Even the undercard suffered from a mixture of terrible booking (the chief cause) and matches that didn’t look that exciting to begin with. The match of the night is tough to say. It was either the Randy Orton/Alberto Del Rio opener or Antonio Cesaro defeating Justin Gabriel, but even that was way too short. When one of the best matches on the card is just over seven minutes and features someone who has been treated like a glorified jobber for the past year then it is clear that the show is in big trouble.

Randy Orton defeated Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez)

Del Rio shows some great in-ring psychology in this bout. He works on Randy Orton’s arm early and often to set up his finisher. Del Rio also uses some standard heel tactics including repeatedly mocking Orton with Orton’s own poses. At one point Del Rio even attempts the RKO! The best move of the match though has to be when Alberto hits Orton with a double stomp from the top rope while Orton is in the tree of woe position. This proves to not be enough and despite some minor interference from Rodriguez on top of Del Rio’s assault Orton pulls out the victory with an RKO.

Rating: 3.5 stars

Team Rhodes Scholars defeated Team Hell No (c), but did not win the WWE Tag Team Championship

Some cookie cutter back and forth action that makes one almost overlook just how underutilized Bryan is in this tag team. The action picks up when Bryan tags himself in and nearly annihilates Rhodes with a diving headbutt! Kane is jealous and pulls Bryan off while Daniel is covering Cody. The Rhodes Scholars come back and the fight spills to the outside where Team Hell No is winning the brawl. Bryan and Kane start arguing again and Kane eventually causes the team to get disqualified when he won’t stop attacking the Rhodes Scholars as an illegal man. Lame!

Rating: 2.5 stars

Kofi Kingston (c) defeated The Miz to retain the WWE Intercontinental Championship

The match has an unbelievably slow start and the audience responds accordingly. Kofi gains momentum when he wallops The Miz with a clothesline while Miz is attempting an attack to the corner. Miz shortly after starts to work over Kofi’s left leg and even takes off his boot. Kofi battles back and wins it with a thunder in paradise. Decent, but not a show stealer (even on this show).

Rating: 3 stars

Antonio Cesaro (c) defeated Justin Gabriel to retain the WWE United States Championship

The two work in some technical wrestling to start. This allows Cesaro, the superior technician to gain an early advantage. Jim Ross mentions that Gabriel is showing shades of Chris Jericho when Gabriel hits a springboard moonsault off of the ropes. Gabriel tries two more aerial maneuvers, but he is not as lucky with either one. First, Gabriel misses a 450 splash. Next, Gabriel dives to the outside, but Cesaro hits him with the European uppercut from Hell! Gabriel sells it like a champ and acts like he is out cold. Cesaro hits a gratuitous neutralizer before the pin. The fans were robbed! This should have been at least another five minutes (in a perfect world at least ten more).

Rating: 3.5 stars

Rey Mysterio and Sin Cara defeated The Prime Time Players

It doesn’t make much sense to put this match after the more prestigious bout for the WWE Tag Team Championship, but oh well. Titus O’Neil barks a bit when he is charge of the match. I guess he keeps trying to sound like a dog, but he reminds me more of a muscular walrus. Also, the baldness isn’t helping. Mysterio wins it after a top rope splash onto Darren Young. Sin Cara had earlier already taken care of O’Neil with a crossbody to the outside. WWE officials come down to the ring after the match and it looks like Sin Cara might be hurt again. However, it is made clear that he is okay.

Rating: 3 stars

The Big Show defeated Sheamus (c) to win the World Heavyweight Championship

At least if this was an actual Hell in a Cell match it would have had a gimmick to add to the action. Instead what fans got was a lot of slow moving, a lot of rest holds and a lot of mildly decent brawling. The only good part about this over 20 minute match is the end. Okay, maybe Sheamus managing to hit Big Show with white noise was kind of nifty too. Right before the end Sheamus kicks out of a WMD. Not to be outdone The Big Show kicks out of a brogue kick. Sheamus attempts to hit the big man with another brogue kick, but instead gets hit in mid-kick with a WMD.

Rating: 2.75 stars

Eve Torres (c) defeated Layla and Kaitlyn to retain the WWE Divas Championship in a three way match

This is the weakest match of the night and the fans are appropriately dead for it. Perhaps more surprisingly the commentary team is dead for it too. At one point JBL says something about all the divas looking alike and it is pretty obvious that he is getting an earful on his magic headset after the comment. Michael Cole tries to call the match, but neither JBL or Jim Ross seem to care instead changing the subject to football. Eve wins following a senton bomb. The Team CoBro skit before the match with Zack Ryder dressed as Eve and Santino Marella dressed as Lady Gaga with a cameo by Ron Simmons was more entertaining.

Rating: 2.25 stars

CM Punk (c) (with Paul Heyman) defeated Ryback to retain the WWE Championship in a Hell in a Cell match

Throughout the night Paul Heyman had begged Vickie Guerrero to call off the match with no success. Shortly before the championship encounter Punk even personally begged Vince McMahon, but with no success. After some stalling Punk first really takes charge of the match by using a fire extinguisher and then attempts to nail Ryback with a steel chair. Ryback catches Punk and instead kicks the chair into his face. However, Punk is persistent and after some time gets a chair shot in. The match has only gone on about eleven minutes when Ryback is about to make Punk shell shocked. The weak twist comes when the referee, former Florida Championship Wrestling (FCW) star Brad Maddox hits Ryback with a low blow and makes a fast count. Punk and the ref then try to leave the cell, but Ryback is too quick and assaults both of them. The show ends with Ryback celebrating after he performs his shell shocked finisher on top of the cell on Punk. Nope, there are no spots off of the cage or breaking through the cage tonight.

Rating: 2.5 stars

Photo Credit: en.wikipedia.org

Tagged Alberto Del Rio, Antonio Cesaro, Brad Maddox, Brock Lesnar, Chris Jericho, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Darren Young, Eve Torres, FCW, Hell in a Cell, JBL, Jim Ross, Justin Gabriel, Kaitlyn, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Lady Gaga, Layla, magic headset, Michael Cole, muscular walrus, Paul Heyman, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio, Rhodes Scholars, Ricardo Rodriguez, Ron Simmons, Ryback, Santino Marella, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Team CoBro, Team Hell No, Team Rhodes Scholars, The Big Show, The Miz, The Prime Time Players, Titus O'Neil, Vince McMahon, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Divas Championship, WWE Hell in a Cell, WWE Intercontinental Championship, WWE Tag Team Championship, WWE United States Championship, Zack Ryder

Sep 27 2012

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Wrestling Reviews

WWE Money in the Bank (2012) Review

WWE Money in the Bank (2012) had a huge drop off in quality from the previous year’s event. That is not to say it was a bad show because when you’re following up one of the greatest non-big four pay-per-views in WWE history it is kind of tough to stand up to the pressure. Anyway, CM Punk and Daniel Bryan had the match of the night though it wasn’t nearly as good as their past pay-per-view encounter thanks to the storyline and involvement of AJ Lee. Sometimes, when two great wrestlers are in a wrestling match then all they have to do is…you know wrestler. The opening ladder match was impressive and the second one that topped the card was even better. All of the other matches were filler except for the match for the World Heavyweight Championship, which saw Del Rio continue to feud with Sheamus in the feud that nobody asked for.

Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero) defeated Damien Sandow, Tyson Kidd, Christian, Santino Marella, Tensai (with Sakamoto), Cody Rhodes and Sin Cara in a Money in the Bank ladder match for a World Heavyweight Championship contract

Tensai assaults Kidd early on and the commentators talk about Kidd recently upsetting Tensai. Christian comes in and he and Kidd rule the ring until Christian turns on Kidd. The match goes on and emphasizes Christian and Kidd a second time when Kidd is laying on a ladder and Christian attempts a frog splash…but Kidd rolls out of the way. Ouch! Sandow is near the case at one point, but minutes later he is getting speared into a ladder by Christian. Sin Cara also takes a good spill off of the ladder when Tensai drives his head into some steel. There is also a fun comedy spot when Cody climbs the ladder and Vickie Guerrero comes up the other side to nag him off of it. Ziggler comes up from behind Rhodes and gets him off of it. Christian meets Ziggler on the ladder while Sandow and Kidd join them from other nearby ladders. Kidd powerbombs Ziggler off and the other two are soon out of the picture also. On the outside Tensai sets up a ladder horizontally and powerbombs Sin Cara onto it. Back inside Kidd, Cody and Christian take each other out as they try to climb including Christian spearing Cody off of a ladder. Christian gets back up and fights Santino off. However, just as Christian is about to grab the Money in the Bank briefcase, Ziggler sneaks up from behind and steals it.

Rating: 3.5 stars

Sheamus (c) defeated Albert Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez) to retain the World Heavyweight Championship

Before the match, Sheamus gives a promo, Miz announces he will compete in the second Money in the Bank ladder match and Mick Foley reflects on his favorite WWE Monday Night Raw moment. However, the best segment before this match is a commercial for the 1989 classic, “No Holds Barred” starring Hulk Hogan. Normally, I don’t like commercials on my pay-per-views, but this is an exception! Anyway, on to the match! Del Rio attempts to dodge Sheamus early on, but Sheamus comes alive when Del Rio smacks him. Sheamus manages a clothesline from the top rope, but gets distracted by Ricardo allowing Del Rio to kick him off of the ring apron. Del Rio brings psychology to the match by targeting in on Sheamus’ arm. Del Rio cannot lock on the cross armbreaker though and Sheamus hits him with the Irish curse. Del Rio makes another mistake by trying to kick Sheamus in the back of the head and missing. This leads to Sheamus hitting him with the white noise and brogue kick for the victory. Del Rio and Ricardo jump Sheamus afterward and Ziggler comes out to collect. Del Rio argues with Ziggler when Sheamus wakes up to brogue kick Ziggler. Because Ziggler is out, but the bell never rang he still has his World Heavyweight Championship contract and Sheamus still has his title.

Rating: 3 stars

Primo and Epico (with Rosa Mendes) defeated The Prime Time Players (with A.W.)

The current holders of the WWE Tag Team Championship, R-Truth and Kofi Kingston sit in on commentary for this match. A.W. provides his own commentary by wearing a headset mic. Primo and Epico take an early lead with Primo hitting a suicide dive and Epico nailing a plancha. Darren Young and Titus O’Neil take charge and get cocky as at one point A.W. even combs Young’s hair for him. Primo and Epico gain back their momentum after O’Neil gets distracted by having an impromptu dancing contest with Rosa. The match continues until the team from Puerto Rico win it with a roll up. The Prime Time Players confront the tag champs afterward and R-Truth throws water in A.W.’s face.

Rating: 2.75 stars

CM Punk (c) defeated Daniel Bryan to retain the WWE Championship in a no disqualification match

AJ Lee is the special guest referee for this match. Punk throws Bryan out of the ring early on and the two trade chopfests on the guardrail. The chops don’t end there and the two are soon trading them inside the ring followed by trading kicks. The match is all over the place as Punk hits a suicide dive leading the participants to fight up and down the entrance way. AJ takes a bump off of the ring apron when Bryan pushes Punk into her. Bryan wallops Punk from behind while Punk is checking on AJ. Bryan then acts concerned for AJ before going back to attack Punk. Bryan hits a running knee from the ring apron to the floor and Punk is in trouble. Punk gets in some offense when they fight into the audience and Punk jumps off one part of the guardrail and clotheslines Bryan off of another. Bryan grabs a kendo stick, but Punk keeps ducking from Bryan’s strikes. Punk eventually takes a shot to the knee and another one to the ribs. Bryan becomes wild as he gives Punk multiple strikes to the back using the stick. Punk taps into his adrenaline and fires back by getting a two count and hitting his high knee. Punk tries the go to sleep twice, but Bryan escapes and kicks Punk in the head. Punk soon grabs the kendo stick and pays Bryan back for the shots from earlier. AJ comes out while the two are down on the mat. She brings in a chair and the two fight over it with Bryan winning. Bryan drills Punk, but cannot get the job done so he punishes Punk with some kicks. Punk clotheslines Bryan and pays him back again with some chair shots of his own. Punk tries to Irish whip Bryan into the chair, but AJ blocks it. Bryan kicks Punk into the chair, but AJ stops him from using the kendo stick. Punk slams his opponent on the chair, but misses the “Macho Man” Randy Savage elbow. Bryan tries to make Punk tap by using the Kendo stick, but Punk gets out of it. Punk slingshots Bryan into the turnbuckle and hits the go to sleep, but only gets two. Punk positions Bryan on the table so he can elbow drop him through it. However, Bryan gets up and attacks Punk on the ropes until Punk fights back and crotches Bryan. Punk performs a belly-to-back suplex through the table for the win.

Rating: 4.5 stars

Ryback defeated Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks in a handicap match

The squash machine wins another squash match on a pay-per-view. Hawkins starts off against Ryback and bumps around plenty for him. Reks gets tagged in and actually gets in some offense. The two keep tagging in and out, but Ryback gets the match going in his favor by bodyslamming Hawkins and decimating Reks. Hawkins takes a sick bump to the floor and Ryback finishes Reks off with his shell shocked finisher.

Rating: 3 stars

Layla, Kaitlyn and Tamina Snuka defeated Beth Phoenix, Natalya and Eve Torres

The crowd is pretty dead for this one until Layla gets tagged in and wakes them up by clotheslining Beth. However, Layla gets caught in a gorilla press slam position. This leads to chaos when all the competitors come in the ring and fight it out. In the end Layla manages to pin Beth.

Rating: 2 stars

John Cena defeated Kane, Chris Jericho, The Big Show and The Miz in a Money in the Bank ladder match for a WWE Championship contract

Oddly enough Show is the first to do a neat ladder spot by throwing a ladder at Jericho to the floor while Show is standing in the ring. Show gets taken out early though when Cena gives him an attitude adjustment through an announce table and everyone buries him with ladders. Still, it is not over as The Big Show later comes back from the dead and rips apart a ladder as Jericho is climbing it. Show rules the match for a while and takes out a huge ladder from underneath the ring. Show climbs the ladder and Kane meets him at the top. Show punches Kane off and Cena comes up next, but gets headbutted off. Jericho attacks Show from behind with a chair and soon Jericho and Cena are climbing up each side of the ladder. Jericho crosses over the ladder and puts Cena in a sleeper hold while Miz tries to steal the match, but instead gets punched off of the ladder. Cena finally falls off of the ladder while Jericho stays on. Miz climbs up the ladder again, but him and Jericho get WMDs from Show as the giant climbs the ladder. Cena returns to the top and nails Show in the head with the briefcase. Cena unhooks it to win!

Rating: 3.75 stars

Photo Credit: en.wikipedia.org

Tagged "Macho Man" Randy Savage, A.W., AJ Lee, Beth Phoenix, chopfest, Chris Jericho, Christian, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Curt Hawkins, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Darren Young, Dolph Ziggler, Epico, Eve Torres, handicap match, hardcore, Hulk Hogan, John Cena, Kaitlyn, Kane, Kofi Kingston, ladder, ladder match, Layla, Lord Tensai, Mick Foley, Money in the Bank briefcase, Money in the Bank Ladder Match, Natalya, no disqualification match, No Holds Barred, Primo, R-Truth, Randy Savage, Ricardo Rodriguez, Rosa Mendes, Ryback, Sakamoto, Santino Marella, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Tamina Snuka, Tensai, The Big Show, The Miz, The Prime Time Players, Titus O'Neil, Tyler Reks, Tyson Kidd, Vickie Guerrero, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Monday Night Raw, WWE Money in the Bank, WWE Tag Team Championship

Sep 24 2012

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Wrestling Reviews

WWE No Way Out (2012) Review

WWE No Way Out (2012) had a lot going against it before the show even started. John Cena taking on The Big Show for the umpteenth time was booked as the main event. Despite some possibly good matches the rest of the card was booked pretty thin. Alberto Del Rio was yanked out of the World Heavyweight Championship picture and Dolph Ziggler was put in his place. Regardless of what you think of Del Rio or Ziggler there is no denying that in the months leading up to this card Del Rio was built up much better. Ziggler on the other hand had received a push that was underwhelming to say the least. The match for the WWE Championship was much more promising and delivered. So let us take a look at WWE’s big day in June.

Sheamus (c) defeated Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero) to retain the World Heavyweight Championship

The early going of this match revisits Sheamus’ Wrestlemania 28 encounter with Ziggler getting a kiss from Vickie only to turn around for a brogue kick. Ziggler sees Sheamus preparing for it and ducks out of the ring. Sheamus roughs him up for a while, but Ziggler hits a sweet looking DDT. Now in control, Ziggler goes for a pin, but only manages a one count. Sheamus gets Ziggler in a fireman’s carry position, but Ziggler gets out of it for another DDT. Ziggler is putting on rest holds left and right making for a weary crowd. The match drudges on until Ziggler hits a zig zag. The crowd chants, “lets go Ziggler,” but Jerry Lawler swears the audience is chanting, “lets go Sheamus.” Ziggler hits a face buster from the ropes, but Sheamus continues to kick out. Sheamus gets in an Irish curse then it is just a matter of time before the brogue kick and the three count.

Rating: 2.5 stars

Santino Marella defeated Ricardo Rodriguez in a tuxedo match

Santino actually held the WWE United States Championship during this bout which has to make it among the low points for places that this title appeared at. The two try to appeal to the audience to start off and Santino wins. Ricardo rips off some of Santino’s powder blue tux first. Santino responds in kind and manages to get off Ricardo’s jacket. Santino then holds up the jacket like a matador and Rodriguez attempts to strike. The fight drags on and “boring” chants break out. Santino reveals he is wearing a cobra sock while Rodriguez is stripping him. Santino hits Ricardo with it and wins revealing that Ricardo has on underpants featuring Alberto Del Rio’s face.

Rating: 0 stars

Christian defeated Cody Rhodes to retain the WWE Intercontinental Championship

Well, they picked the right match to get things back on track. Cody starts by getting Christian in a headlock. After some punishment Christian gets in the power position with some shoulder blocks. The fight spills outside and Cody takes charge by throwing Christian back in the ring and working on his left elbow. Christian puts Cody’s legs around a ring post, but before he can do anything Cody pulls Christian into the post. Rhodes keeps working Christian’s arm, but when the action goes outside again Christian jumps on the ringside steps and DDTs Rhodes. Back inside Christian gets a top rope crossbody, but Rhodes rolls it over for two. Christian hits a top rope hurricanrana, but only gets two. Cody gets an Albama slam on Christian, but can’t manage to win. Christian hits the killswitch, but only gets two. Christian attempts the frog splash, but Cody puts his knees up. The match erupts into a series of misses and reversals until Christian hits a spear to pull out the victory.

Rating: 4 stars

The Prime Time Players defeated Primo and Epico (with A.W. and Rosa Mendes), The Usos and Tyson Kidd and Justin Gabriel to become the number one contenders for the WWE Tag Team Championship

Titus O’Neil and Jay Uso start off and they soon tag in their partners leading to Darren Young getting some chops in The Usos’ corner. Things are pretty quiet until Justin Gabriel gets tagged in and The Prime Time Players mess him up. Young gets Gabriel in a chinlock and the match quiets down again. Gabriel rebounds slightly and The Prime Time Players exit to allow Primo and Epico in to double team Gabriel. Tyson Kidd finally gets tagged in and he hits an array of moves on Primo culminating in a blockbuster from the top rope. Primo gets things going for him after avoiding some Kidd offense. This doesn’t last long because Kidd hits a hurricanrana to the outside that takes out everyone as they brawl on the floor. Primo and Darren Young come back in and Young lifts Primo up a drives him into his knees. Young gets a three count while A.W. holds onto Epico’s leg as he tries to make the save. A.W. has betrayed his team and gone onto manage The Prime Time Players.

Rating: 3.25 stars

Layla (c) defeated Beth Phoenix to retain the WWE Divas Championship

Before this match HHH laid out a challenge for Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman. Getting back to the wrestling, Beth gets an early advantage by laying in some power moves and trash talking her opponent. Layla hits a dropkick and starts mocking Phoenix. Beth starts beating down Layla after hitting her off of the ring apron. Phoenix makes a mistake by putting Layla in a gorilla press slam position that Layla reverses into a DDT. Shortly after Layla hits a neckbreaker for the win.

Rating: 3 stars

Sin Cara defeated Hunico (with Camacho)

The WWE continues to use the stupid lighting gimmick for Sin Cara’s singles matches. Hunico is dominant early on after scoring a dropkick. Hunico keeps Sin Cara grounded and puts him in three separate chinlocks. Hunico hits Sin Cara with a sitout powerbomb, but then Sin Cara starts building up momentum and hits a hurricanrana on Hunico after bouncing off of the ropes. Out of nowhere Sin Cara gets the three count.

Rating: 3 stars

CM Punk defeated Kane and Daniel Bryan to retain the WWE Championship in a three way match

Throughout the night AJ Lee had backstage segments with all three competitors including making out with Kane. At one point Punk and Bryan slug it out with Bryan saying, “yes” and Punk saying, “no.” Punk wins the slugfest and Bryan exits the ring. Punk attempts a suicide dive, but Kane stops it. Soon, Kane and Bryan are outside the ring allowing Punk to hit a plancha on them. Kane attacks Punk after taking out Bryan with a right hand. After a while Kane is really taking apart Punk’s midsection, but makes a mistake when inside the ring Punk hits him with a big boot. Bryan comes out of nowhere with a flying dropkick on Punk. Bryan takes center stage and even hits a double dropkick from the top on both opponents simultaneously. Following this up, Bryan delivers a slew of kicks that the crowd chants along with. Eventually, Punk hits the “Macho Man” Randy Savage elbow on Bryan for two. Punk tries one on Kane, but misses. Bryan gets a diving headbutt on Punk. After a kick, Bryan then clamps on the yes lock, but Punk reverses it into a pin. Punk hits the go to sleep on Bryan, but Kane saves him. Kane goes for the chokeslam on Punk, but Punk reverses it into a DDT and hits a top rope elbow. Punk attempts the go to sleep on Kane, but it is too much weight and instead he gets a big boot and chokeslam. A little later AJ tries to run in, but Kane accidentally bumps her off of the ring apron. While Kane is distracted Punk wallops him with a kick to the head followed by a go to sleep for the win. Kane carries AJ out afterward as she looks fondly at Punk.

Rating: 4.25 stars

Ryback defeated Dan Delaney and Rob Grymes

The jobber duo sing the classic Wrestlemania theme before Ryback comes in. It is a decent squash match. Ryback even goes to the ropes and falls down like a big tree on one opponent. Ryback says, “feed me three” before obliterating his victims. Matches like this work to cement Ryback’s status as the current squash machine of squash machines.

Rating: 3 stars

John Cena defeated The Big Show in a steel cage match

If John Cena wins this one then Vince McMahon will fire John Laurinaitis, but if The Big Show wins then Johnny Ace will fire Cena. Show throws Cena into the cage to start. He tries to hit the WMD early on, but Cena ducks and Show smacks his fist against the cage. Show stays dominant, but The Big Show makes a big mistake when he tries to climb the cage and Cena crotches him on the ropes. Show comes back and delivers a Vader bomb. Big Van would be proud. The big guy is not done with his aerial moves and he walks to the middle of the top rope for an elbow…that misses! Show attempts to crawl out, but Cena catches him. Cena almost gets out after a shoulder block. Ace shuts the cage door, but McMahon opens it. Ace shoves McMahon and slams the door again. Cena turns around for a chokeslam. Show hits two WMDs, the first one on the ref then one on Cena. Show attempts an escape, but Brodus Clay is outside the cage door with a steel chair. Santino, Alex Riley, Zack Ryder and Kofi Kingston join Brodus. Show climbs (after somehow knocking Ryder out through the cage wall), but gets knocked off the top by Kofi. Cena then gives Show the attitude adjustment. Cena wins and Ace is out! Cena emphasizes it with an attitude adjustment through an announce table on Ace as McMahon delives his classic line, “you’re fired!”

Rating: 2.25 stars

Photo Credit: en.wikipedia.org

Tagged "Macho Man" Randy Savage, A.W., AJ Lee, Alberto Del Rio, Alex Riley, Beth Phoenix, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Cage Match, Camacho, Christian, CM Punk, Cody Rhodes, Dan Delaney, Daniel Bryan, Darren Young, Dolph Ziggler, Epico, HHH, Hunico, Jay Uso, Jerry Lawler, Jimmy Uso, John Cena, John Laurinaitis, Johnny Ace, Justin Gabriel, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Layla, Paul Heyman, Primo, Randy Savage, Ricardo Rodriguez, Rob Grymes, Rosa Mendes, Ryback, Santino Marella, Sheamus, Sin Cara, squash machines, Squash Match, The Big Show, The Prime Time Players, The Usos, Titus O'Neil, Tuxedo Match, Tyson Kidd, Vader, Vickie Guerrero, Vince McMahon, World Heavyweight Championship (WWE), WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Divas Championship, WWE Intercontinental Championship, WWE No Way Out, WWE Tag Team Championship, WWE United States Championship, WWE Wrestlemania, Zack Ryder

The Johnson Transcript

Devourer of Wrestling

Tag Archives: Ryback

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: Elimation Chamber (2013)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers and Bad Booking

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: Royal Rumble (2013)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers, Jeremy Cundiff and Bad Booking

How The Shield Changed The Game

by Bad Booking

WWE Pay-Per-View Roundtable: TLC—Tables, Ladders & Chairs (2012)

by Daniel Johnson, Kyle Childers, Jeremy Cundiff and Bad Booking

6 Great Matches You’ve Never Seen: Part II

by Jeremy Cundiff

2. Taka Michinoku vs. The Great Sasuke from WWF In Your House 16: Canadian Stampede (1997)

WWE Survivor Series (2012) Review

by Daniel Johnson

WWE Survivor Series is Tonight

WWE Hell in a Cell (2012) Review

WWE Money in the Bank (2012) Review

WWE No Way Out (2012) Review

Follow “The Johnson Transcript”