Did This Guy Eat Four of Wrestling’s Biggest Gimmicks?

In the dying days of the USWA the people in the company were throwing anything against the wall to see what would stick. Accordingly it was only a matter of time before they put the gimmicks of “Macho Man” Randy Savage, The Ultimate Warrior, Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan in a blender and gave it to someone. It is unfortunate that the guy chugging down the frothy mixture was this obese lug. Scratch that “unfortunate.” This gimmick would have been “unfortunate” no matter what. Instead this uncoordinated whale taking on the gimmick can best be called tragic.

The above clip starts out sadly enough with Randy Hales blabbering on until Bert Prentice (who probably would have been a more athletic Ric Hogan) tries to calm him. Hales will not simmer down and instead continues to rant saying that his wrestlers will win all of the USWA’s gold. The sad part? Hogan already held the USWA Heavyweight Championship.

Hales is really pushing for a USWA World Tag Team Championship win. So how is he going to earn this? Is Hogan going to regurgitate some of that cursed shake and split into “Warrior” Hogan and “Macho” Ric, the latter of which sounds like a regular at a circa 1982 bathhouse? Thankfully, the creative team in Memphis had a sliver of mercy and instead paired him with Crusher Bones.

Crusher Bones starts the match off by beating on T.D. Steel, who by this point in his USWA run probably would have preferred working in a steel mill. Hogan gets tagged in and thrown by Bones into Steel. That should have been the match right there.

A side note that is worth mentioning: throughout this entire bout the commentary team is trying to get over “The Colorado Kid” Mike Rapada, arguably the lamest NWA World Heavyweight Championship holder ever.

Back to the action Flash Flanagan finally comes in, but apparently doesn’t want the stink of the match on him and tags in Steel. It really says something when Slash Venom from TNA is embarrassed to be in a match. He tags back in Steel who receives a gelatinous legdrop from Hogan to end this mess. Now, the healing can begin.

Categories: Wrestling Clips

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