by Daniel Johnson
Dirty Buxx Belmar vs. Oni
This edition of ISW Free Match Monday was actually uploaded a few hours past Monday, but still early enough to be featured on The Johnson Transcript on Tuesday so it is all good. The voice of Beyond Wrestling, Denver Colorado lends his pipes to this match featuring the man who will take on ISW Champion, Izzie Deadyet at ISW Burger King of the Ring II: Double Whopper, Dirty Buxx Belmar and the leopard man, Oni.
Crotchtastic is the word that best sums up this match as with about seven minutes of in-ring competition the wrestlers manage to make a lot of the match revolve around one another’s crotch. First, while Oni is clamping on a sleeper hold, Belmar reaches inside his trunks to get his hands nice and stinky then puts them on Oni’s face. Then Belmar nearly wins the match by landing a flying crotch in Oni’s face. Finally, it degenerates to Oni just rubbing Belmar’s face in Oni’s junk. Somewhere in between all this the wrestlers hit some more traditional moves and Belmar skins the leopard man’s chest with a brutal chopfest. The match never gets too serious though as the two get ready to wrap things up they try to attack each other with an open condom. To borrow a crappy catchphrase from The Miz, “Really?” For the finish Belmar nails a gut buster and gets a three count.
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